Okay so I met a guy several months ago. Went out on two dates with him but was just not into him for several reasons which I won’t go into this time around. In any event I kind of just let things die down in hopes that he would take the hint. Does this sound heartless? I have a general thought that the longer you know someone/ go out with someone the more respect you should give them if things don’t work out. So if you’ve been dating someone for two months but just don’t feel that it’s going anywhere then you should, out of courtesy, talk to them and let them know how you feel. But if you’ve only gone out with someone once or twice it might be okay to just stop calling. This happens a lot so this “philosophy” is not uniquely mine. People do this to each other, right or wrong, all the time. It’s happened to me, I’ve done it to others. The world goes round. The idea, I suppose is that you just aren’t close enough after one/two dates to expect anything from anyone. This guy, in particular, I did not chat on the phone with and we went out twice in the span of a month. He mostly contacted me via text messages which I didn’t particularly care for as the major source of communication. Anywho, he would send texts daily. Nothing exciting- just “how are you” or “good morning”. I would respond. But after a while it became tedious as it was hard to walk around my building at work to find a signal to respond and after I lost interest the trouble didn’t seem worth it.
Eventually I stopped responding.
He still kept texting.
I still was not responding.
To this day I get a text from him once a week (as opposed to initially every day). It has been say 4 months since our last date and last conversation. Why is he still texting me? Seriously- any thoughts people?
As I’ve mentioned in past posts, I’ve gotten the people who have texted me like a year after I met them as if I should remember them. That’s weird in itself but this dedication to texting me is something totally different. The messages are pretty simple as stated earlier but the fact that he is still making the effort is perplexing. Why? Can he not know I’m not into him? I can’t help but find it a bit creepy now… Maybe this is a lesson to just tell someone you just aren’t that into them even after just one/two dates?
5 comments:
I agree with the thought that if after a date or two if someone stops calling or texting then move on.
I do it to guys. I just quit calling, emailing, responding.
Sad thing, I might try it after twenty dates too. Just stop and hope he gets the message I don't want to be with him any more. (yes sometimes I am rude).
Now this guy you posting about I don't know what he read in your simple messages but, he heard a whisper.
I'm thinking that he is hoping you will respond to one of his text messages and if you do he will start with texting you again daily.
I would ignore it and if it doesn't stop in a week or so you might have to s-p-e-l-l it out for him.
I don't want you or your texting.
b honest
tell folk
he would get ghost
i would
never had that
problem though
I hear what you're saying but after three/four months of not returning call/text how can someone NOT know you aren't interested? I'm worried about stirring up trouble by even responding now. I just really want to know how he could not know.
He's probably thinking that the door is still open. You haven't come right out and given him the "I'm just not interested" speech, so he could be thinking he should try to stay in contact just in case. Or maybe he just wants to maintain a friendship.
However, I really don't understand why brotherman would sweat you this hard when you're not responding, at all. It would seem obvious to most people, after 4 months, especially, that it is time to move on.
Someone once told me about the 3-date rule, if you aint feeling it after 3 dates, they get they get the boot, no excuses. I found it helped me to not hold onto something that aint even there.
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