Saturday, December 29, 2007
I've made my efforts, gone out, joined social groups, online dating (I joined as a "social experiement and find it isn't soley for freaks although there are some of them, anyway, I'd recommend it), changed my usual MO when I go out. All to no avail. I've even heavily contemplated moving because my area leaves much to be desired in the eligible bachelor realm (we were afterall named one of the fattest, uglist cities in some magazines in the past). But I think, good things come to those who wait and I don't stress. You just can't control this type of thing. It doens't hang up on looks or personality (there are plenty of unattractive (although thats subjective right?) and mean people who are in relationships). It's just how the proverbial dice is rolled. But until then, I'll go on my random dates, hang with my friends, do a little traveling, focus on my writing and just keep things moving and being the person I hope I was intended to be- what else you going to do?
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Their mother has a lot on her hands-
16 year old little sis to Brittney Spears is knocked up! A high school student who lives in Louisiana, Jamie Lynn Spears reportedly met the father, Casey Aldridge, the son of a Tennessee papermill worker, at church.
Apparently they weren’t paying attention to the sermons!
Hmm is it a coincidence that this happens to be the final season of her Nickelodeon show (no did not know that on my own, it was in Yahoo Entertainment, I do have my limits on what I watch!)
New York New York- Choose Tailor-made over Buda. I actually agreed with this one because Buda was reminiscent of Tango from first season and New York can’t handle a "man's man" (albiet a little urban). Tailor-made is just enough “woman” for the gal who says she wants a wife and she’ll be the husband. He was just fine with that! It appears that they’ve been living together (with his 12 year old daughter who gets along with her-wow) ever since the show ended- guess it’s working out for them (hopefully because do we really want to see another show)! I actually want to see the reunion show next month.
You gets no love from me- Wesley Snipes may face some real jail time for not paying taxes- he’s claiming racism as a result of “unscrupulous tax advice”. If someone tells you to claim 12 million dollars in refunds and not to file returns from 1999-2004 ya needs to raise more than an eyebrow dude. Go to jail, go directly to jail…
“Because nothing says I love you like a Glock”.- News says that Drew Peterson bought his currently missing wife a gun for Valentines Day. Seriously? I can tell you many other things that say I love you- jewelry, flowers, nice dinner… Hmm, I wonder if he’s guilty?
Side note, not that I don’t think they should keep coverage of a missing person in the media, but I am ever so slightly annoyed that they don’t do this for people of color, is it seriously all about race and class? So if you’re a black, broke person who’s missing, you’re as good as dead?
Oh and to the ass who stole a guy's wheel chair while he was using the bathroom at a Walmart in Hagerstown, MD- special place in hell for you buddy- that is so not Christmas!
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Teen shoots and kills people at church.
Teens beat up guy on subway.
Teens accost guy on MTA.
Teen takes on life after shooting, after being picked on, after being rejected.
So after hearing what seems to be the 10th story in the last few weeks about teens committing violence against others I gotta say something: What in the world is going on? I still have a wee bit of my twenties left and don’t fancy myself so far removed from this generation to not understand them but this violence baffles me. When I was in school kids seemed more violent and crueler than generations before but lately this violence has been turned outward to strangers and authority figures or grown ups. It’s as if some kids don’t live in fear of repercussions.
No fear of punishment, “whoopins”, detention, jail or death! This new surge in youth violence crosses all racial lines. This is not a white problem or a black problem, it’s an US problem. Or maybe the media is just hyping youth violence up since Columbine and this is really nothing new, we just think it is because of the greater coverage. I’m not so sure about that. And if it’s not true then that means that something has definitely changed in our environment to bring out such aggression. TV and its narrow definition of what is cool that bores its way into kids subconscious? Or is the world become so violent that kids are becoming desensitized (has violence gone up a notch or is it that kids are becoming more exposed to it than they were in the past?). Or have adults babied their kids too much?
There has been a lot of discussion recently about how my generation, and I suppose the younger generation, has a different work ethic than those before us. We need instant gratification and were raised to be praised at every step of the way. We quit jobs quicker if we don’t see progress in our career sooner and crave awards. This is the total opposite of our parents who may have stayed at jobs they despised for 20-40 years and never received so much as a thank you from their bosses. We also live at home longer than our parents did. On the bright side (not to sound arrogant) we’re smarter and faster. On the down side, we are less patient and less humble.
So I suppose if that type of parenting is continued, one in which we are praised for almost doing nothing and are not encouraged to stick with things when they get tough (with the assumption it’ll get better), what kind of people will this produce if this child rearing pattern intensifies? I think we’re looking at it. Spoiled brats who have an all about me attitude. No fear of punishment.
Now, I am not saying all kids are like this. I have read up on some teens that are helping to change the world for better and there are many teens out there adhering to the rules and not causing trouble. And I suppose it’s safe to say that the violent teens have a lot more going on than bad parenting and the screwed up media. But these incidents bothered me and I just had to wonder what was going on!
Monday, December 10, 2007
Disclaimer: I'm not anti religion and believe in the Lord but I also believe in thinking out the box and exploring ideas. So don't mean to offend anyone here!
Okay, so I was inspired to talk about this after hearing on the today show that Germany has been having an eye out for the Church of Scientology for about a decade now and wants to ban it because of the cultish behavior. I have had the same concerns about that sect before as well as a few others. However, then I thought, isn’t all religion, in some form, a cult? At least if you follow it to the degree that man has formulated it. I’m not talking following the Bible independently and believing in It’s word. I think the cultish atmosphere comes from how mankind behaves because of it. In Catholicism you follow one man- The Pope. And what he says goes (even if it doesn’t coincide with what the law allows such as abortion and divorce). He can even excommunicate you if he thinks you aren’t doing as the Bible would want.
Protestants do the same but this is not as well known. I have heard many instances where one was asked to leave the church because of their behavior no matter if they wanted to or not. And becoming a Jew or Muslim is no walk in the park either. Jehovah Witnesses have members come and make “house visits” to other members to get an idea if their living their life right. And every group has rules be it based on the Bible or Koran or a supplement. Technically you should only date and marry one of your kind, meaning if you are Jewish then another Jew, if you are of a type of Christianity then you must be with the same. All groups follow a leader within their place of worship, some unquestioningly. They go out and recruit. Some where certain garments only. Some Christian religions restrict drinking alcohol, or dancing to secular music or watching certain types of films (like horror or Harry Potter)
Our ideas of cults are the whole David Kuresh (sp?) thing or the Jim Jones bunch but you don’t have to take up arms or drink the punch to be a cult. It’s more a frame of mind, to me. That leaves little room for opposing thinking. Ends individuality. To a degree all religious practices are like that. It’s just that some entail more harmful practices and as such gain the title of cult. I have no problem with following religious ideals but when man gets involved things become a little cloudy…
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
NBC nightly news is continuing its limited series on black women. Next up- our personal lives- in particular interacial dating and its rise for black women (see video). I'm all for it. For many of us growing up a black man was the ideal image of who our husbands would be. Post college and the cold reality that 40% of black women don't get married (and even more horrifying that 70% of black children come from single parent-woman raised- homes) many of us have changed our views. Especially if you are a well educated, economically sucessful woman. As one man stated in the on line web segment of this topic, "their simply aren't enough black men up to par" (I was kind of intrigued that it was coming from a black man saying that and not a woman). I'm not saying I have to date a white collar guy like me. I'd rate a plummer as pretty sucessful but even that is hard to find. And lets face the reality if you are on your way to making close to six figures and live a certain life style of travel and having nice clothes and living enviornments, its hard to get into a relationship with a man who is making half your salary, not educated or traveled. I mean if a woman who marries a man who makes more than she is "moving up", then if she marries one who is not in her economic range is she "moving down"? If you are used to Nordstroms and Paris as a way life, would you be satisfied with meeting a guy who can only do Kmart and Bush Gardens? Would even a compromise be sufficient? Would you be okay with paying for most things to keep up with your style? Sounds cold but its something to consider. And not only that- good luck in even meeting a black man if you are in certain fields. The higher you go, the less black men who are in your workforce or area (unless you meet them at the club). I know more white males than black males now compared to my days in highschool and even college and am finding that I have more in common with some of them as well.
I would never turn my back on a whole race of men and will always give a black man a chance (provided of course that we are compatable, but that goes with anyone) but opening up your dating pool only leads to a greater chance of finding love. And hey, lets be real, its not as if black men are only dating black women!
Monday, November 26, 2007
African American women: where they stand Posted: Monday, November 26, 2007 12:50 PM by Barbara Raab
By Rehema Ellis, NBC News correspondent
Editor's note: Rehema's report airs on tonight's broadcast, in Part One of our series, African American Women: Where They Stand
For years, Black women have told their daughters they may have to take care of themselves without a husband so it's imperative that young women develop skills.
It is happening.
The numbers of Black women earning college degrees and taking leadership roles in the workplace are impressive.
And the huge achievement gap between African-American women and men is astounding. Black women are making gains in record numbers. It may suggest to some that Black women have gotten the empowerment message and have met all accomplishment goals. That would be only half right. According to research, there is still a lot of work to do.
Black women, like all female business owners, still lack business parity with men in some key areas.
Most of the companies owned by Black women are part-time ventures, often run from home at night and as a way to boost daytime pay as women care for children and/or aging parents. And according to the Center for Women's Business Research, as of 2006 just 5 percent of companies owned by Black women had employees, versus 10 percent for Black men. Annual revenue averaged $29,000 compared to $77,000 for Black men.
Still, Black women are moving ahead "... driving trends in the market place, and there are advertisers that are seriously starting to pay attention to her," says Angela Burt-Murray, editor-in- chief of Essence Magazine.
"I think this is the best time in our history to be a Black woman in America. By most conceivable measures we are excelling."
But she and others caution that as there is excitement about the advancements made by Black women, society should be equally concerned about how Black men are falling behind academically and economically. Plus, some caution against viewing those disappointments as affecting only African-Americans.
"I don't think that what you are seeing right now should be viewed in isolation. Researchers will tell you that the trends you see in the African-American community really are the precursor to what is going to happen in the general population," says Burt-Murray.
All the more reason to pay attention to what's happening to Black women and men and to understand that their story is not just an African-American story. Far from it.
This is an American story deserving everyone's concern
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Racist Halloween incident may have repercussions for Myers, ICE
By Christine Cave
cyberFEDS® Washington Bureau
WASHINGTON -- Federal employees and managers must remember they represent the government at all times -- even when having fun at an office party.
Julie Myers, President Bush's pick to lead the Department of Homeland Security's Immigration and Customs Enforcement, may have put her Senate confirmation in jeopardy after she participated in a three-judge panel that awarded the agency's most original Halloween costume to a white employee who darkened his complexion with makeup and dressed up in dreadlocks and a striped prison uniform. Myers also posed for a photo with the costumed employee.
The costume drew fire from fellow employees as being racially insensitive and could create liability issues for the agency. Myers was recess-appointed by Bush but must be confirmed by the end of the year to retain her post. Although she was confirmed by the Senate Homeland Security Committee by an 8-1 vote in September, some senators are questioning the nomination following the incident.
Sen. Harry Reid, D-Nev., said he had serious concerns about Myers' nomination.
"I plan to consult with the chairmen of the committees with jurisdiction over her nomination," he said at a press conference.
Sen. Claire McCaskill, D-Mo., has also objected the to nomination and voted against Myers' confirmation in committee.
But Sen. Susan Collins, R-Maine, met with Myers on Nov. 5, and discussed the incident, according to a staff member. "Collins has concluded that Myers recognized serious mistakes in judgment, regrets the incident and apologized. Collins believes she has done good job at ICE and is inclined to support her," he said.
Saturday, November 17, 2007
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
- Sensativity by Ralph Tresvant over Put you to Bed by J Holiday (okay guys we know you can have sex but can you sustain a positive relationship)
- Mama- Tupac over Duffle bag boy by Lil Wayne (since when has being little been cute on anything other than pet or a baby?)
- Self Destruction collaboration over I get Money Collaboration
Of course we have a few artist who think out the box Common, Outkast, Roots, Kaos, Kanye West (yes I said it), Jill Scott, Maxwell (where the hell is he by the way).
Which leads me to vent on my Top Ten Songs that did nothing for Black people and women:
10. Freak- Adina Howard- just how I like men to think of us
9. Body Like a Car- R. Kelly (may get some titles wrong but [shrugs in disconcern])
8.Thong Song- Cisco (did I spell his name wrong- who cares)
7. Back that Thing up- Juvinille (no I will not)
6. Anything by Luke
5.Skeet Skeet (?)- Lil John (disgusting)
4. Rump shaker- Teddy Riley and some other dudes (I think this started the whole down grade)
3. Supaman- by who and cares
2. Put it in your mouth- by I and forgot
And the number one waste of my listening time....
1. Hard Out here for a pimp - Three 6 Mafia (for trying to make us feel bad for criminals and for actually winning an Oscar, here's an extra pimp slap to the Oscar committee for enforcing stereotypes and having them perform on the show).
Any honorable mentions out there?
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Monday, November 5, 2007
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Copyright October 5, 2007
Time goes fast but I move slow
To a destination of nowhere
A circular motion of sameness
Exhaustion of movement but no finish
A constant repetition of the undesirable
A battery of pain that never subsides
All hopes and dreams dissipate like smoke into nothingness
A long forgotten moment
Crushed dreams, last finger slipping form the ledge of a hope-filled reality
Battered heart, body and soul leading to darkness
Tomorrow is national black out day in which Rev. Al Sharpton and other civil rights leaders are calling for Black people to boycott companies that show little interest in black folk. Essentially they would like us not to buy anything tomorrow.
Now I get it, I'm curious to see the statement it would make if most people actually did so, which not to be negative, I'm sure most won't. Let's face it, the majority of what we as consumers get was founded on some form of racism, be it slavery, discrimination in the work place or out right racist thinking. And most of what we get, doesn't come from us, even in markets where we are the biggest consumers (soul food, black hair care). It just got me thinking that most of what we use to function is not from companies fun by Blacks and some really could be. Perhaps if this boycott was better prepared (got people people enough notice to get the things they need so they won't go without on Friday or be tempted to buy) this would be more powerful. But I see the power in this boycott. The next stage to MLK's plan before his assassination was economic freedom. After the physical freedom and then the educational freedom we were then to put those to good use and empower ourselves to make us a force to be reckoned with. Needless to say, that never happened.
And while there are plenty of black entrepreneurs out there making money for themselves through clothing lines, shoes, perfumes and the like, how is that spreading the wealth? How do some other cultures get it done so successfully? I have no answers but until that time, I wish that we as a people would be more intelligent about our spending choices especially to avoid being so predictable (ever notice how now McDonalds is only advertising to Blacks and Latinos now, what does that say about our eating habits as well?). Stop giving our money to things that aren't improving us and start supporting black businesses ( and not meaning businesses that cater to black folks only but all folks and that it just happens to be run by a person of color) and once you have a good thing going, employ other black people who are qualified. Money is power in this country but so are numbers especially when those powerful numbers are going towards a strong goal.
Just my rant for the day...
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Don't know if I have 7 random or wierd facts about me and don't have 7 blogger friends yet so I guess I can do less.
1) I hate most white foods (and no I'm not racist)- mashed potatoes, milk (unless with cereal and then only a small amount), white bread, mayonaise, vanilla ice cream (unless mixed with chocolate candy or cookies)- yuck
2) I've been writing since I was 11 years old and my sixth grade teacher thought I had real talent. I even pinned a play that some kids in my class put on.
3) I love the movie alien now but was terrified of it up until a few years back but being a horror fan i so wanted to see it. So i took baby steps, i first watched it bit by bit (the unscary parts), then watched the whole thing on mute (sound effects were too much for my heart) and then i could watch it fully normally and now its nothing.
4) I love Anime (otherwise known as Japanese animation). I may just be one of probably 5 black women in the country who actually watch it. But I've been hooked ever since I was little from Speed racer reruns, salior moon and Inuyasha. I've seen too many to count. I don't like the kid stuff though like Pokemon.
5) I hate chick flicks (never seen Titanic). I think they give us false hopes. Romance isn't like that and we want it to be so when its not our hopes are let down. And then whose in the wrong- the realistic guy or the dreaming girl (good blog topic).
6) I mostly deceided not to go into Criminal Law because of the movies Cape Fear and Primal Fear- who says movies don't effect real life? All I'm saying is Robert Deniro and Edward Norton scared the hell (and love of law) out of me. Suddenly civil rights law seemed the way to go. But excellent movies
7) I'm about the same weight now that I was when I was 13. Either I was fat then or I'm thin now. I prefer the latter and then there is the fact that I haven't grown in height since 6th grade either.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
But fellas this is tough on a female too. Guys turn women down. Women fear rejection too. And with todays impossible standards on female beauty, the shot to the ego that rejection can bring I say is stronger than what a male has to deal with. Especially when women don't go soley by looks but hone in on personality and background (hello Jay-Z, Jermaine Dupri, Russel Simmons, Forest Whittaker, Chris Rock and a host of others didn't get beautiful women from their killer looks). And the men have it easy. They are outnumbered by women and an average guy can get an above average female so men can be picky.
So with that said, I'm of the opinion that women asking men out is a lot tougher than the flip side. Why can't there be a middle ground? If I drop a smile at a guy, can't he come the rest of the way and start the dialogue? And if I do go up to a guy, what does that guy think of me- that I'm like Samantha from Sex in the City, a little loose? Or even simply that I'm a bold assertive chick? But what if I'm none of these and simply am eating my nerves at that moment to get what I want, will he lose interest when he finds I'm not that bold in real life? And what hints does a woman get from a man that he's interested to let her know to make a move? Women smile, touch, pay close attention to guys we dig. What do men do?
Sigh, sometimes I wish we were in the days of Jane Austin (minus the slavery and repression of course) and just did courtships. Leave the hard work to the elders...