NBC nightly news is continuing its limited series on black women. Next up- our personal lives- in particular interacial dating and its rise for black women (see video). I'm all for it. For many of us growing up a black man was the ideal image of who our husbands would be. Post college and the cold reality that 40% of black women don't get married (and even more horrifying that 70% of black children come from single parent-woman raised- homes) many of us have changed our views. Especially if you are a well educated, economically sucessful woman. As one man stated in the on line web segment of this topic, "their simply aren't enough black men up to par" (I was kind of intrigued that it was coming from a black man saying that and not a woman). I'm not saying I have to date a white collar guy like me. I'd rate a plummer as pretty sucessful but even that is hard to find. And lets face the reality if you are on your way to making close to six figures and live a certain life style of travel and having nice clothes and living enviornments, its hard to get into a relationship with a man who is making half your salary, not educated or traveled. I mean if a woman who marries a man who makes more than she is "moving up", then if she marries one who is not in her economic range is she "moving down"? If you are used to Nordstroms and Paris as a way life, would you be satisfied with meeting a guy who can only do Kmart and Bush Gardens? Would even a compromise be sufficient? Would you be okay with paying for most things to keep up with your style? Sounds cold but its something to consider. And not only that- good luck in even meeting a black man if you are in certain fields. The higher you go, the less black men who are in your workforce or area (unless you meet them at the club). I know more white males than black males now compared to my days in highschool and even college and am finding that I have more in common with some of them as well.
I would never turn my back on a whole race of men and will always give a black man a chance (provided of course that we are compatable, but that goes with anyone) but opening up your dating pool only leads to a greater chance of finding love. And hey, lets be real, its not as if black men are only dating black women!
5 comments:
Girl, LOL at the "Kmart and Busch Gardens" line.
How about Target and Six Flags? Then I'm witcha!
Well you know my stance on this. Iffin you are lucky enough to find a great guy, grab him and hold on cause I think a real true love is scarce and hard to find these days and one cannot limit themselves, especialy in out demographic.
But you bring up some interesting questions in the "dating down" comment. I think a lot of us have had to consider reevaluating out rigid standards in the quest to find love in that it could just leave us high and dry for awhile.
And like you said, if the man's heart is good, should it matter that he's not pulling in top dollars or has fancy degrees n his wall, which lets face it, won't really have anything to do with how he treats you. All that is immaterial and some of us need to look past that.
Or else accept perpetual singledom.
you need to move to nyc or southern california. i am serious chica.
Hmm, think I'll have to make a trip to southern cali and visit the ny a few more times!
Pardon the cliche but love is colorblind if you allow it to be.
Hey. I didn't know they had specials on us over there???!!! Why didn't I know. That darn ABC. I always have it on ABC and didn't know this. As for interracial dating. I will admit that I can only count on one hand how many black men I've dated all my life...
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